We’ve studied and qualified. We’re on the bridge of a new world, a new era in our lives. We’re saying goodbye to childhood, teens and establishing ourselves in our new ‘young adult’ space - ready to look out for ourselves, ready to venture into the unknown.
They say we should feel empowered; ready to take on the world. Intrigued; ready to see, smell, taste, hear, feel the world.
R.I.G.H.T. Sure we are.
The truth is we are all these things and more…we’re also doubtful. We fill our sentences with ‘what if’s’ and ‘maybe’s’. We’re excited to meet new people and make friends but scared to lose the old ones. We’re unbelievably psyched about stepping out of a broke-student mentality and ready to reap the rewards of four years hard studying (read: PAY US FUTURE EMPLOYERS!) but skeptic of moving into a space ruled by materialism and greed. All these things and more…
Know what? When we were young we learnt to walk at age 9-18 months! We learnt to communicate at 4 months, speaking fluently by +/- age 3-4. We went to nursery school, we motored into primary school and we missioned, all legs-shaven-eyebrows-waxed-and-dress-hems-hoisted, into high school. We did all these things and more.
So what is different? What has changed? Yes, we have become more aware of our surroundings and eerily more so aware of a little thing I like to call (but hate to call on) CONSEQUENCE! Everything we think of, every idea we sprout is stomped to the ground by ‘consequence’.
LAME LAME LAME LAME LAME!
Let’s scrap the worry-pot mentality and rise to the occasion. Lets suck it up (our fears, our worries, our desperate concern at having to achieve achieve achieve!) and choose instead simply to live as we did before, as we are doing now.
Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Monday, July 12, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
We are afraid of the wrong things
Consider the statement ‘We are afraid of the wrong things’.
Well, that would depend on what it is that you are afraid of. Personally I fear being a victim of crime, of disappointing people who are important to me and not succeeding.
Although my string of fears are perhaps the wrong things to be afraid of, fear in itself is not necessarily a bad thing. Fear keeps you cautious. Sometimes it keeps you motivated. It can even keep you safe. How would one determine a valid fear and what is the difference between the right and wrong fears? In my opinion, a valid fear is one that holds consequence. For example:
‘I’m worried that I can’t pay rent this month’ – valid fear
‘I’m scared to lose my child to this disease/virus’ – valid fear
Our fears are motivated by results. They are also motivated by our doubts. You can’t pay rent? Well then, you’ll just have to find somewhere else to live. You don’t have a deposit or the finances to do that? Well then, on the street you go. Your child or a loved one is deathly ill? You might lose him/her.
On the other hand, fears that are created out of irrational worry are often invalid fears. In some cases, people’s fears develop into phobias. Phobias, however unreasonable, can consume a person, leaving them with anxiety disorders and the inability to lead a normal life. It is my opinion that in a case such as this, most fears are invalid. For example:
Allodoxaphobia- Fear of opinions. (Well now...)
Anablephobia- Fear of looking up. (At what?)
Chromophobia or Chromatophobia- Fear of colours. (Tell that to a person robbed of his/her sight)
Deipnophobia- Fear of dining or dinner conversations. (You must be boring then – read a book)
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia- Fear of long words. (Of course it is)
Levophobia- Fear of things to the left side of the body. (???)
Syngenesophobia- Fear of relatives. (Hmmm, perhaps this one I understand)
The point is, we could be afraid of everything everyday but where would that get us? Four padded white walls and imaginary friends (the kind that don’t carry germs and disease, don’t allow for emotional hurt, don’t expect us to push our limits... oh boy, can’t wait!)
Ultimately, however valid a fear may be, it is reasonable to consider that the world does go on. You will heal, in time. Your situation may improve, in time.
So perhaps next time we come across something that is slightly scary, something that strips us from our comfort zones, let’s put it into perspective: will this activity result in 1) my death, 2) permanent physical harm, 3) the end of the world?
If this doesn’t work, you can find comfort in the fact that you are not the worst off when it comes to being afraid. Yes, you may be overly cautious and a nervous wreck but you will work through your fear in the end. It could be worse; some people are afraid of themselves!
Well, that would depend on what it is that you are afraid of. Personally I fear being a victim of crime, of disappointing people who are important to me and not succeeding.
Although my string of fears are perhaps the wrong things to be afraid of, fear in itself is not necessarily a bad thing. Fear keeps you cautious. Sometimes it keeps you motivated. It can even keep you safe. How would one determine a valid fear and what is the difference between the right and wrong fears? In my opinion, a valid fear is one that holds consequence. For example:
‘I’m worried that I can’t pay rent this month’ – valid fear
‘I’m scared to lose my child to this disease/virus’ – valid fear
Our fears are motivated by results. They are also motivated by our doubts. You can’t pay rent? Well then, you’ll just have to find somewhere else to live. You don’t have a deposit or the finances to do that? Well then, on the street you go. Your child or a loved one is deathly ill? You might lose him/her.
On the other hand, fears that are created out of irrational worry are often invalid fears. In some cases, people’s fears develop into phobias. Phobias, however unreasonable, can consume a person, leaving them with anxiety disorders and the inability to lead a normal life. It is my opinion that in a case such as this, most fears are invalid. For example:
Allodoxaphobia- Fear of opinions. (Well now...)
Anablephobia- Fear of looking up. (At what?)
Chromophobia or Chromatophobia- Fear of colours. (Tell that to a person robbed of his/her sight)
Deipnophobia- Fear of dining or dinner conversations. (You must be boring then – read a book)
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia- Fear of long words. (Of course it is)
Levophobia- Fear of things to the left side of the body. (???)
Syngenesophobia- Fear of relatives. (Hmmm, perhaps this one I understand)
The point is, we could be afraid of everything everyday but where would that get us? Four padded white walls and imaginary friends (the kind that don’t carry germs and disease, don’t allow for emotional hurt, don’t expect us to push our limits... oh boy, can’t wait!)
Ultimately, however valid a fear may be, it is reasonable to consider that the world does go on. You will heal, in time. Your situation may improve, in time.
So perhaps next time we come across something that is slightly scary, something that strips us from our comfort zones, let’s put it into perspective: will this activity result in 1) my death, 2) permanent physical harm, 3) the end of the world?
If this doesn’t work, you can find comfort in the fact that you are not the worst off when it comes to being afraid. Yes, you may be overly cautious and a nervous wreck but you will work through your fear in the end. It could be worse; some people are afraid of themselves!
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